Make Your Bed In The Morning If You Want To Live

One of the best written pieces I have had the pleasure of reading is the epic "68 Bits of Unsolicited Advice" by WIRED founder, Kevin Kelly. I'll link to it at the end of this write-up, but when he dropped it, I essentially laminated it. And I have attempted to emulate it every now and then. So nothing original here, just me doing a remix.

Here we go.

1. If there is one thing you must do before you hit the showers every morning, make your damn bed. And I don't mean just spread out the sheets and blanket...I mean get into the edges, prop up the pillows, makes sure the sides are even, smooth out the top layers. It requires your two hands, focus, and you get some head time to yourself even if only for a minute. It annihilates the "I didn't accomplish anything today" narrative even b4 your day is started.

2. And please tell the house cleaners you got it. They can do the toilet.

3. The first rule of holes is if you find yourself in a hole, stop digging. The kinds of holes you see these days, people might as well be deep hole drillers. In fact, folks are building hole corporations, digging holes for others. Wahala products and services as I call them.

4. I don't know the name of one single member of Biden's cabinet. Or the name of his kids or grandkids. That's a good thing.

5. Busyness is a sin. Most of us are sinning like crazy right now. Ask for forgiveness.

6. There's a reason rivers are easiest to cross at their source. Nip that $#!+ in the bud, before things get worse. Enough of this marinating, adding all this pepper to the soup. Handle your business now.

7. I read the Underground Railroad before I watched the Underground Railroad. I am the person you want to hear his review of the show, not the person who didn't even know there was a book b4 the show and gave the show one star out of five. Especially since they didn't watch the damn show.

8. Thuso Mbedu. South African. Thespian. Mark her down. She's a freaking revelation.

9. If your country has cancelled Twitter, then that means the universe wants you to take a freaking Twitter break for goodness sakes. Stop tweeting for a bit. Quit gnashing your teeth in public, and chill out for a sec. Because we know you'll go ham once it is turned back on.

10. Speaking of Twitter and social media, here is a gift I am giving to the world: Guardrail—a tool that previews your posts to a trusted select group of people you designate to yay or nay the post b4 it posts. Yay, it posts. Nay, it doesn't. I told you I am a genius. Just because I am not on the top 3 of 3 Geniuses list doesn't mean I am not a genius.

11. I have said I won't share my opinions on the Royal Family kata-kata. The one thing that bugs me though is why Harry and Megan's friends haven't asked them to watch The Crown. Might have helped with playbook development, especially with spawn number two. This is why I tell people, subscribe to Netflix. Wait, they already have a deal with Netflix, shé? Oh, well...carry on with the drama.

12. You know, only two members of my extended family on this e-list open this newsletter, and that's the Twins. It's ok, no wahala. But when Oprah and Elon Musk start musing about Fashi Mindset being their weekly cup of tea, and Amazon Video has bags full of suspect cryptocurrency knocking on my door, then people will be like "Chidi was always special." Hmm, don't special me o, don't special me.

13. 🤓 🙃 🤨

14. I can't remember where I copied this phrase from but I get the shivers every time I see it and delete all my social media apps: You are indulging in the empty calories of existence instead of finding the real nourishment. Kai. Hold my beer...let me re-delete these apps one more again.

15. When is Ghana going to become a member of the G7? The thing is even named after Ghana.

16. The world is unfair. Things are not going your way. The system is rigged against you. So what am I supposed to do? No, lighting my hair on fire on your behalf is not an option. Here...I have a lighter, and I see you have hair too. It will look better.

17. I just got a request from an extended family member in Nigeria to send her some kickboxing gear. Evidently because three of the current MMA champions are African, that is the way out now...to become an MMA fighter. I am not sending her the gear. She can kick rocks.  

18. A gem I borrowed from Ray Dalio: When two people believe opposite things, chances are that one of them is wrong. It pays to find out if that someone is you. It was always me, so much so I renamed it the Afulezi Marriage Management and Development Doctrine.

19. My version of the famous Michael Douglas line from the movie "Wall Street": The point is, ladies and gentlemen, that bread is—for lack of a better word — is good. Bread is right. Bread works.

20. And finally, I had to drop some Denzel as only he can do, breaking it down on branding with fellow movie god Jamie Foxx. It's not about being known, it's about being good. Applies to every damn thing. Preach, sensei.